Tuesday, January 27, 2009

FIRST!

Here it is! Where's Me Pint's first post for 2009! Hazaa! Just in case you're living in a cave and your satellite Internet connection will allow you to connect to this blog and nothing else, here's how things have gone down in 2009 so far:

A black man has seized control of the White House, finally signalling the end of the American civil war. Who would have thought whitey would lose?

In unrelated news, everything else has gone to shit.


I'll get back to you at the end of 2009 to give you an update on whether humanity has survived, but I'm going to be honest with you Jim, from where I'm sitting things aren't looking good.


The barbarians are at the gates. I pray the Lord forgives us our sins.




UPDATE!!!


I have just at this moment realised this post doesn't make a lot of sense. To my critics who say my posts should make more sense, I say this, and simply this:


Purple Monkey Dishwasher!


And more importantly: Fuck off! I've already made my views known on you critics and your criticising criticisms. Your Head-a-splode!!


This is 2009, the year of the Lunatic on the Chinese Calendar, and being a lunatic, it seems my time has finally come.


It's good to be King.



MEGA UPDATE!!!


It has been pointed out to me that it is, in fact, the year of the Ox on the Chinese Calendar, not the year of the Lunatic as I may have previously suggested. But seeing as I was born in the year of the Ox, it is still my year, so rock on, bitches!

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